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Chapter 1

Derp was building a house when he heard an 

oink. He went to feed the pig, but there was a 

creeper next to the pig. He did something dumb 

and tried to feed the pig, but the creeper was 

about to explode, so Derp tried to think of a 

plan. The creeper was going to explode in 

10...9...8...7...Derp ran and ran...6...5...4...3 

then Derp got to his house...2...1 boom! His 

house exploded into pieces! Brick by brick the 

blocks fell the to the ground.

He picked up all his blocks then started 

building his house. After two blocks he felt a 

little poke. He turned around and saw his 6 

year old friend named Munchey. Munchey told 

Derp that he had his first day of school, but his 

teacher could not be there. He asked Derp if he 

could substitute for the class. "Sure friend," 

said Derp in a very stupid way. "Yipee," yelled 

Derp. Unfortunately Derp does not even know 

how to sing "a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s 

t u v w x y and z," which probably means Derp 

is bad at school and never went to school!

Chapter 2

"Hello kids, today I'm your teacher... 

1+1=poo" Derp said. "I will be fun because I 

have my friend Munchey to keep me 

interesting." Munchey's face turned bright red.  

"Kids, I'm going to the the potty, bye." Derp 

went into the women's bathroom and stuck his 

head in the toilet and started screaming, "I'M 

FLUSHING! I'M FLUSHING!" All the kids ran 

into the bathroom to see what was going on. 

Even the boys came into the bathroom!

One kid got the principal, Mr. Polockometo, to 

help Derp get his head out. "DERP YOU ARE 

GOING TO BE REPLACED BY MR. HARMO!"  

Derp started to be dragged out of the school 

and he started to shout his goodbyes... "Bye 

Bye!" When he got home he sat on his couch, 

turned on the TV, and the news was on. The 

news said that there was going to be a style 

contest in 2 weeks. Derp did his derpy face 

and said, "I'm going to do that contest." He 

ran to his room and tried on something snazzy. 

That didn't work but what will?" asked Derp.

Chapter 3

Derp went to the kitchen to get something to 

eat, but all he had to eat was one piece of 

bread.   He went to the store to get something 

to eat and looked at the frozen food section. 

"Boring," he thought, but when he looked on 

the other side he saw PIZZA! He took the pizza 

and went in the sweets, and that's when the 

madness started. It was like Christmas to 

Derp. Derp started to pick up every single 

thing off the shelf, suckers, cookies, and 

bubble gum, and ran back home.

When he got back he sat on the couch and 

started eating his sweets that he didn't pay for, 

and saved the pizza for dinner. He turned on his 

favorite show, ABC Little Babies. Yeah that really 

is Derp's favorite show. Then, he had an idea for 

the style contest. He wanted to dress up like a 

baby, but he wanted to do it tomorrow so he 

didn't miss the ABC Little Babies marathon. It is 

his favorite show, and you would not want to 

miss your favorite show like Derp, either.

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